Sunday, April 12, Antigonish, Nova Scotia, Canada – The Sun is Shining
By Lisa Walsh, ANTIGONISH, NS, CANADA
The sun is shining, I’ve opened my window to the kitchen. The cats enjoy this, as they realize it’s the sign that their mother, the caretaker, is now up for the day. For them, this means fresh water, bowls of food topped off, litter changed, treats, morning snuggles, the start of their routine, and mine.
The apartment is quiet, I sit and remind myself to breathe, to prepare for what I am about to ingest today. By ingesting, I mean not just eating and drinking, what I’m mentally going to prepare myself for, knowing that things are going to get worse before better.
So I wait a little longer.
I practice gratitude.
Today I woke up, millions didn’t. Today I have lots of food, some people haven’t eaten in weeks, I have fresh water, some people have to fight for their right to clean water. I have a roof over my head, it’s warm and cozy, some people live outside and can’t get warm. My home is safe, I am not stuck, I am safe, I repeat this many times. For some, their homes are not safe but a personal hell. The more I am thankful for, the more I remember other things I am grateful for.
I am blessed.
I turn the internet on, I use to welcome what I may read every morning, now I dread it.
I will be optimistic, maybe this will change things.
HEADLINER- Nova Scotia has 21 new cases, bringing the total to Nova Scotia has 428 confirmed cases of COVID-19. Twenty-one new cases were identified Friday, April 10. There will be no #COVID19NS media briefings today or throughout the holiday weekend, but the government will continue to provide daily updates on case numbers.
It baffles me that our boarders haven’t completely shut down to anyone other than non essentials, until a few days prior. There is now viable proof that it’s not just from people contacting it from those who have traveled.
There is community spread.
People aren’t taking this seriously, my blood boils, I feel my temperature and blood pressure rising.
I can hear our Disappointed Premiere and Dr. Strang now,
You guys are like children, you do not listen, you are all grounded, go to your homes and stay there !!! I chuckle at my sense of humor.
Am I losing it? Have I lost it? Breathe Lisa, you cannot control others, only how you react.
Tears fill my eyes, I knew what I was preparing myself for, why am I allowing this to weaken my immune system?
I go grab my water and an apple, turn on some tunes and dance around the apartment.
Raise those vibrations.
I’ve been alone for 31 days, just me and my 3 cats and 70 odd houseplants.
I am thankful for their company, how lonely it would really be if not for them.
My partner is an essential worker,
I miss him.
He stays away because I am immunocompromised. He doesn’t want to chance coming in contact with a carrier and bringing it back here to me. This is hard, hard not to be able to hug, touch, kiss your partner. Your whole world changes in a matter of days, and now it’s day 31.
31 days alone, 31 days of no human touch, 31 days of, wow, here I am falling down the rabbit hole of negativity. Let’s change the subject, shall we?
The quiet drowns out my never-ending thoughts. Silence can be deafening. I embrace silence like the sunshine on my face as it peaks through the window in little bursts of warmth and light.
I am okay, I am safe, I chose to be happy today.
I have bananas mashed in my fridge, 6 to be exact.
My friend has sent me her recipe and asked me to guard it with my life and not share it with this recipe with others.
I snicker, she has a sense of humor. I am making double chocolate banana loaves. My mouth waters thinking about it.
I will make one for myself and one to share. Sharing brings me happiness these days. I’ve noticed that it does the same for others. I am blessed to have so many people who look out for me. I am fortunate and thankful.
Cat # 2 has crawled up for his morning snuggles. I greet him with a pat on the head.
I have groceries, I do not need to ask anyone to go to the store for me. I have not been inside a store or public place in over 31 days.
I am thankful.
Everyone’s stories of stores and life outside my apartment make me uneasy.
The Invisible War has never sounded more fitting in my life. I see it through my phone screen, I dare not venture out to see it for myself.
I have no masks as of yet, anyway.
No masks mean no travel for me. My backyard is where I sit or stretch or walk around.
My cat is kneading on me ( making biscuits), and it hurts.
Time to reposition and think of what I will do today.
My morning routine is done and over with.
Maybe I will plant some more seedlings and go outside and sit. My garden outside my window has signs of spring and life, this makes me happy, excited, and I enjoy it temporarily.
Today sounds like a good day to just enjoy the fresh air. This makes me hopeful!
Maybe something really good will happen today.
I stop and admire my plants, paintings, creations, cats, and all of the comfort of my home.
I genuinely do appreciate the little things.
I hope everyone can in times like these.
Maybe tomorrow I will write again,
Perhaps tomorrow we will have lower numbers or no climb at all.
Tomorrow is an array of possibilities, I hope for the best.
Please stay safe, hang on, I’m rooting for you.
Stay safe, friends.